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Hamptons.com
November 18, 2019

Sixty-Something: A Favorite Hamptons Farm To Purchase Holiday Pies

T.J. Clementeby T.J. Clemente
in Community
Home Community

Back in the day for Thanksgiving, my mom would bake pies, usually an apple pie and then my favorite, a sweet potato pie. Ah the smell of those pies cooking in the oven would permeate throughout the whole house. Now my wife is quite gifted in making pure apple pies without any sugar, although she uses a touch of pure maple syrup. She loves making them and I love eating them.

I remember once buying two apple pies at some farm off Route 100 in southern Vermont “apple country.” The plan was to bring them back home and surprise my parents. It was from their favorite Vermont farmstand. When we stopped at the farmstand, the farmer said we had to wait because the new pies were still in the oven. Then out came his wife with the two apple pies in these white boxes. The pies were very hot. My girls were about 8 and 10-years-old and I had a huge Montero with two extra seats in the back for the girls. The pies were placed in between the seats with the girls and where the middle seats were folded down. The aroma of those two pies was amazing and before long we pulled over and ate one of the pies right on the side of the road, right out of the box. The crust melted in our mouths and the apples were a warm sweet soft yet firm collection of baked quarters of Vermont apples.

Throughout the North and South Forks, there are numerous places to purchase pies. My favorite farmstand to purchase an apple pie is located at Seven Ponds Orchard located at 65 Seven Ponds Road in Water Mill. I am not saying their pies are the best, or the best deal, I am just saying this is my favorite place in the Hamptons to purchase fresh homemade apple pies.

Ten years ago, in November 2009, I was driving from Montauk to Patchogue with my girlfriend, who is now my wife, and I wanted to impress her parents. We were on our way west to visit them, so we stopped off at Seven Ponds Orchard to buy an apple pie for them. They wanted Cindi to actually bake one for them, but she spent the day with me so we decided to buy one. I pulled in parked and purchased an apple pie. When Cindi’s dad offered me a piece of the pie, memories of that Route 100 Vermont pie raced through my taste buds.

The worst apple pie I ever had was also in the Hamptons. Long before I met Cindi, a wonderful woman decided to bake me an apple pie because I told the story of the Vermont Route 100 apple pie. However, as sweet as the woman was and perhaps still is, the pie she baked was overcooked and tasted a touch like apple charcoal pie. However, I told her it was really tasty and had a second piece. Just writing and thinking about the horror of what it looked like makes me laugh.

Thank you mom and thank you Cindi for those wonderful homemade pies and perhaps someday I recommend everyone sample a Seven Ponds Orchard apple pie, too.

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Can you tell us a bit about your background and how you first got into comedy?⁠
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DB: Well, my background is a little complicated, but the quick version is I grew up in Queens, flunked out of St. Francis Prep at 14, and ended up going to Ireland to boarding school in 1990. It was a crazy, life-changing experience, but it definitely saved my education and ultimately inspired a comedy career that in the early days focused a lot on being an outsider looking in. It’s hard to know if I ever would have tried stand-up if I hadn’t been in Ireland. I got sober at 19 and it was a comedian I knew from that world that pushed me to try stand up. Once I got on stage that was all she wrote. I was addicted.⁠
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#desbishop #comedy #westhampton #whbpac
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