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September 8, 2020

Sixty-Something: A Man’s Home Is His Castle

T.J. Clementeby T.J. Clemente
in Community
Home Community

The seasons are about to yet turn again with Labor Day now behind us and the year 2020 entering its final few months. My reality check came this week when the nurse at my doctor’s office said my next appointment would be in three months on December 3! Unfortunately, the COVID-19 crisis is still unfolding.

I took a pause this morning feeling some sort of strong appreciation for my home. American Patriot, James Otis, once said, “A man’s home is his castle,” and as I age, I seem to understand that more. Going home, being home, leaving home are all powerful phrases, because there is a certain intangible to the saying there just isn’t any place like home.

In sixty-seven years of living, I have had 13 addresses I have called home – including three in the Hamptons. The range goes from a horse farm house in Groveton, Virginia to an overpriced luxury New Jersey condo on the Hudson River, to a historical apartment in Georgetown, D.C. Yes, I moved around. Yet, within the list are two Pelham Manor, N.Y. homes where I actually spent half of my life growing up and watching my own children grow up. There also is New York City Upper East Side post-divorce address that gave me my material for my first novel, Whistling Past the Hottie Graveyard.

Now I am living in our, I say our because it’s with my wife Cindi, who I live with, modest but oh so cozy East Patchogue home. We have trees we have planted yielding apples, rose bushes now blossoming, and huge sunflowers that are reseeding themselves yearly. The Montauk Daisies are about to pop soon. This is the home that is my castle. It has artifacts from every home I have lived in. From the oil paintings that hung in my parents’ home, to a very wonderful rocking chair from the home I raised my kids, and lots of other stuff from every other residence.

This last year this house has been our fortress in staying safe from the Coronavirus. My wife and I have spent more summer Saturday nights watching Hallmark Movies in our basement media center than all the other years combined. We missed going to the Bay Street Theater, along with the others in Mattituck, East Hampton, Southampton, and Quogue. Not seeing those towns enjoying their local live theater has been sad. Not seeing our theater friends has been tough, with one or two passing on.

Years back, my wife and I were sharing a cocktail with then East Hampton Town Police Chief Eddie Ecker Jr. and his wife at a Montauk establishment. I first met Eddie while doing a piece on his mom being the Grand Marshal for the Friends of Erin St. Patrick’s Day Parade. He asked me what else do I do besides write. I said I only write and he then said, “Nobody makes enough money to live on the East End by only writing.” Yet, there I was renting a room with my dog in Montauk right off the ocean. Some people called that place The Montauk Shore Condominiums, but quite frankly it’s a well-located trailer park. In the summer the trailers became toaster ovens and, in the winter, ice boxes, but it never bothered me – as week after week I covered stories, met people, and watched Montauk change into what it is now.

It was while living there I met Cindi. When my landlord sold off the trailer, Cindi invited me and my beagle to live with her temporarily in her apartment up-island, in Patchogue, until I found a new place to live. Then a neighbor reported a dog was staying in the apartment and she was ordered to get rid of the dog. At this time, we were not married yet. Cindi fought the order to remove the dog and won, but also located and then purchased the home we have spent the last ten years in. This home has a lot of love in it. This home has become my final castle.

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October 30 @ 05:00 PM - October 30 @ 08:00 PM
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A Season in Sound: A Look at the Year to Come

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Wine & Cheese Class at Wölffer

October 30 @ 06:00 PM - October 30 @ 07:30 PM
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LTV Presents a Night of Spooky Fun: Vampire Masquerade

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INTERVIEW: VSOP Projects Owner Jonathan Weiskopf On A Special Montauk Exhibition Highlighting The Works Of Courtenay Pollock, Longtime The Grateful Dead Tie-Dye Artist

INTERVIEW: VSOP Projects Owner Jonathan Weiskopf On A Special Montauk Exhibition Highlighting The Works Of Courtenay Pollock, Longtime The Grateful Dead Tie-Dye Artist

  • Dust off your favorite witch’s hat and opt for a paddleboard instead of a broom for Paddle Diva & Wych’s Bloom’s inaugural Witches Paddle on Wednesday, October 29, from 4–6 p.m. at Paddle Diva (10 Boat Yard Rd., East Hampton, NY). A portion of the proceeds will go to the Surfrider Foundation’s Eastern Long Island Chapter and its efforts to protect the world’s oceans, waves, and beaches through dedicated activism. ⁠
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We’ve all seen Witches Paddles grace our social media feeds, and now you can partake in the spooky fun! This tradition combines Halloween vibes with the healing power of nature as you glide and take in the beautiful Three Mile Harbor views.⁠
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Gina Bradley excitedly shared, “I am thrilled to be hosting this at Paddle Diva’s permanent location inside Swan’s Marina (formerly Vanderveer’s). This kind of paddle has been on my mind for many years, as I’ve seen them in all parts of the world, and it looks so cool seeing all the witches gracefully gliding along the water. This is particularly exciting because we’ve joined forces with Wych’s Bloom, a local herbal apothecary brand, and Surfrider to raise money and awareness for ocean and clean bay initiatives that are crucial for our waters on the East End of Long Island.”⁠
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“As an herbalist, Samhain, or Halloween, offers a special occasion for me to celebrate the healers who came before us to teach the wisdom of the plants in our region. I had seen people gathering for Witches Paddles all over the country, and as a surfer, I connected instantly with these events. When I texted Gina the idea, she was immediately in. That’s what I love about the women on the East End—they’re always up for an adventure,” shared Wych’s Bloom owner and Surfrider Foundation board member Christina Winters.⁠
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Join us in taking part in this one-of-a-kind event! Craft a witch’s outfit and set sail at the inaugural Witches Paddle for a great cause.⁠
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@paddlediva @wychs_bloom⁠
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#witch #witchespaddle #paddlediva #hamptons #halloween #easthampton⁠
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  • Check out the top Hamptons events this weekend!⁠
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🍎 Wölffer’s Cider Fest⁠
📅 Sat, Oct 25 | ⏰ 2–5PM⁠
📍 The Wine Stand, Sagaponack⁠
Sip cider, enjoy live music, games, and lobster rolls!⁠
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🍦 Buddhaberry’s Spooktacular Costume Party⁠
📅 Sat, Oct 25 | ⏰ 2–4PM⁠
📍 Buddhaberry, Southampton⁠
Bingo, trivia & costume prizes galore!⁠
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👻 Haunted Village⁠
📅 Sat, Oct 25 | ⏰ 11AM–4PM⁠
📍 Southampton History Museum⁠
Ghost stories, pumpkin carving & trick-or-treating!⁠
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🧙‍♀️ CMEE’s Halloween Bash⁠
📅 Fri, Oct 24 | ⏰ 4–6PM⁠
📍 CMEE, Bridgehampton⁠
Spooky crafts, games & costume contest!⁠
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🎬 The Horror Show at Sunset Theater⁠
📅 Oct 24–30⁠
📍 Westhampton Beach⁠
7 nights of scary movies 🍿⁠
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🎧 Halloween Silent Disco Dance Party⁠
📅 Sat, Oct 25 | ⏰ 7–10PM⁠
📍 Guild Hall, East Hampton⁠
3 channels, endless grooves—disco, funk & more!⁠
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🐾 Canines in Costume at LongHouse Reserve⁠
📅 Sat, Oct 25 | ⏰ 10:30AM–12:30PM⁠
📍 East Hampton⁠
Dress up your pup + enjoy treats & fun!⁠
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🎃 Bridgehampton Halloween Parade⁠
📅 Sat, Oct 25 | ⏰ 10–11AM⁠
📍 Hampton Library, Bridgehampton⁠
Trick-or-treat parade down Main Street!⁠
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🎸 The Cherry Bombs at The Stephen Talkhouse⁠
📅 Fri, Oct 24 | ⏰ 8PM⁠
📍 Amagansett⁠
Rock out all night! 🤘⁠
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🌲 Enchanted Forest Trail⁠
📅 Oct 25–26 | ⏰ 12–1:30PM⁠
📍 Quogue Wildlife Refuge⁠
Costume walk + crafts + games!⁠
⁠
🥁 Annual Ragamuffin Parade⁠
📅 Sun, Oct 26 | ⏰ 1PM⁠
📍 Sag Harbor⁠
Parade fun for all ages + pets!⁠
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🐶 Little Lucy’s Annual Pet Parade⁠
📅 Sat, Oct 25 | ⏰ 1–4PM⁠
📍 Agawam Park, Southampton⁠
Prizes, live music & celebrity judges!⁠
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🕸️ Solé East’s Halloween Party⁠
📅 Sat, Oct 25 | ⏰ 8PM⁠
📍 Montauk⁠
Win a free weekend stay for best costume!⁠
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🍁 Centro’s Fall Festival⁠
📅 Sun, Oct 26 | ⏰ 12–5PM⁠
📍 Hampton Bays⁠
Pumpkin decorating, drinks & local vendors!⁠
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🔗 Click link in bio for more events at Hamptons.com⁠
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#hamptons #halloween #pumpkins #scarymovies #southampton #sagharbor #easthampton #costumes
  • East Hampton’s streets came alive with wagging tails and smiling faces for ARF’s 32nd Annual Stroll to the Sea Dog Walk. Families, friends, and their dogs gathered at the historic Mulford Farm, where the morning kicked off with vendors, photo ops, custom merchandise, contests, and prizes.

@arfhamptons 

#arf #hamptons #community #mainbeach #adoptdontshop❤️
  • Last Saturday, Wölffer held its annual harvest party at its scenic vineyard in Sagaponack. The annual fest brought together friends, families, and wine lovers to toast the season and harvest behind every bottle of Wölffer wine.⁠
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📸: Cameron Burton⁠
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Check out the full gallery at Hamptons.com (Link in Bio)⁠
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#wolffer #hamptons #wolfferwine #harvestparty
  • From Hollywood red carpets to Milan exhibits and Hamptons fashion shoots, Filbert Kung has photographed the world—but it’s his quiet, unguarded, and attentive nature that reveals the artist behind the lens.⁠ @filbert_kung 
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I met Filbert Diego Kung at a Grey/Ven fashion event in Amagansett last summer. He’s one of those rare photographers who instantly puts you at ease—calm, composed, and naturally good at making anyone feel like they belong in front of his lens. Had I known then just how in-demand Filbert is in the fashion and photography world, I probably wouldn’t have asked him to snap a few shots of me goofing off on the red carpet. But maybe that makes me a model? Either way, it was my first glimpse of how effortlessly he captures people as they are. In my case, goofy-but-make-it-chic.⁠
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Since then, I’ve seen him popping up around the Hamptons, often between flights to LA, Miami, or wherever the next big editorial or campaign takes him. Originally from the Philippines, Filbert has spent over fifteen years building a career that bridges Hollywood red carpets, high-fashion editorials, and fine art portraiture. ⁠
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Read the interview at Hamptons.com (Link in Bio)⁠
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⁠#photographer #photography #hamptons
  • From fall festivals to concerts, a lot is happening in the Hamptons this weekend! ⁠
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Check out the top Hamptons events this weekend!⁠
⁠
🎃 Fall Festival at Good Ground Park⁠
📍 Hampton Bays | 🗓️ Fri, Oct 17 | 🕓 4–6PM⁠
Bring your pre-carved pumpkin & compete for prizes! Games, food truck, costume parade & more!⁠
👉 Link in bio⁠
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🍷 Wölffer’s Candlelight Fridays⁠
📍 Sagaponack | 🗓️ Fri, Oct 17 | 🕓 4–7PM⁠
Live music, seasonal pairings & cozy vibes 🍁⁠
👉 Link in bio⁠
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🖼️ Like No One: Michael McDowell Exhibition⁠
📍 East Hampton | 🗓️ Oct 17–19⁠
🎉 Opening reception: Sat, Oct 18 | 4–8PM⁠
Fine art lovers, don’t miss this!⁠
👉 Link in bio⁠
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📚 BookHampton: Caroline Sutton in Conversation⁠
📍 East Hampton | 🗓️ Sat, Oct 18 | 🕕 6PM⁠
Nature meets literature in this insightful author talk.⁠
👉 Link in bio⁠
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👟 Shelter Island Fall 5K Run/Walk⁠
📍 Shelter Island | 🗓️ Sat, Oct 18 | 🕚 11AM–2PM⁠
Run/walk for a cause—supporting Breast Cancer Awareness 💗⁠
👉 Link in bio⁠
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🏛️ 32nd Annual Landmarks Luncheon⁠
📍 Maidstone Club | 🗓️ Sat, Oct 18 | 🕦 11:30AM–2:30PM⁠
Hosted by LVIS, spotlighting the history of East Hampton’s Freetown.⁠
👉 Link in bio⁠
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🍂 Amber Waves’ Oktoberfeast⁠
📍 Amagansett | 🗓️ Sat, Oct 18 | 🕑 2–5PM⁠
Seasonal dishes, live music, dancing & games 🎶⁠
👉 Link in bio⁠
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🎻 BCM Autumn: Brooklyn Rider⁠
📍 Bridgehampton | 🗓️ Sat, Oct 18 | 🕔 5–6:30PM⁠
A powerful string quartet performance you won’t want to miss.⁠
👉 Link in bio⁠
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🍷 Cab Franc Forward Winemaker’s Dinner⁠
📍 Shelter Island | 🗓️ Sun, Oct 19 | 🕔 5PM⁠
Multi-course dinner + Cab Franc pairings = 🍽️🍇 perfection⁠
👉 Link in bio⁠
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✨ So much happening this weekend — which event are you heading to first?⁠
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#hamptons #fall #fallfestival #shelterisland #5k #wine #winedinner #amberwaves #wolffer
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