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Hamptons.com
March 26, 2014

Smart Strategies For ‘Spoiling’ Your Kids And Grandkids

Rocco A. Carrieroby Rocco A. Carriero
in Real Estate
Home Real Estate

If you enjoy financially helping out your children and grandchildren, you’re not alone. Giving to them is fun and often provides immense satisfaction. The question is how to help without breaking the bank — and keeping everything in check. Here are some strategies and tips that can help.

  • Give only what you can afford. Your own financial security should be your first priority. Since there is no way to know with any certainty how long you will live or how the market will perform, make sure you give within your budget to avoid compromising your own financial health. Doing so will help ensure your generosity today doesn’t create a financial hardship for you — or your family members — down the road.

  • Give the gift of time instead of money. Even if you want to give money to your children and grandchildren, it may not be appropriate to do so. Many young couples and/or parents take pride in their financial independence. The experience of letting those we love live within their own means is an important life lesson. If your children prefer to make their own way in the world, consider giving the gift of your time instead of your money. Whether it’s spending the day at the beach, taking in a movie or volunteering, you’ll enjoy the time making memories together.

  • Discuss your intentions. If you would like to help support your grandchildren or save for their future goals, such as college, talk with your children to let them know your plans. This can help your kids do a better job with their own financial planning. For example, if they know how much you are saving toward a grandchild’s education, they may be able to save more of their dollars for retirement. Be sure to talk with your financial planner or tax advisor before setting up education accounts to identify the opportunities that are best suited to your goals and financial situation.

  • Give season passes. Instead of giving money or material goods, treat your children and grandchildren to experiences. Depending on their interests, give them an annual pass to their local zoo, science museum or water or theme park. If you can afford it, think about season tickets to the theater, orchestra or a local sports team.

  • Plan a vacation. Treat your family to a multi-generational family vacation. To help keep spending in check, create a budget and let everyone know what you do and don’t plan to cover — from travel expenses to food, lodging and excursions — so that everyone knows upfront what to expect. Also, be thoughtful of those who have to take time off of school or work by scheduling travel over national holidays or school breaks.

  • Give equally. To help prevent family battles and avoid damaging relationships, give equally to your children and grandchildren to the best of your ability. If you need to give more to one person to help him or her through a rough patch, consider adjusting your will if you want to even things out.

  • Clarify whether you’re making a loan or giving a gift. If you are loaning money, be specific about the terms and a repayment plan. Also, make sure you have a written document that both parties sign and date. This will help safeguard your financial situation if things go bad by providing you with legal recourse. If you are giving a gift, be upfront about it. Let the recipient knows it’s a gift to alleviate any uncertainty about whether or not they need to pay you back.

    For help determining how much you can give and/or ways to leave the legacy you desire, consult your financial professional. He or she can evaluate your financial situation and create a strategy to help you meet your goals.

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    LOCAL EVENTS

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    • ✨ Top Hamptons Events This Weekend: November 7–9, 2025 ✨⁠
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🍸 Sip a Stray Dog Martini at Calissa to Support Tyler’s Rescue⁠
📅 Fridays, Nov 7–28 | ⏰ 5pm–11:30pm⁠
📍 Calissa Hamptons, Water Mill⁠
Enjoy a Stray Dog Martini and support Tyler’s Rescue, a foster-based dog rescue in the Hamptons.⁠
🔗 Link in Bio⁠
⁠
🦅 Birds of Prey at Marders⁠
📅 Sat, Nov 8 | ⏰ 1–3pm⁠
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Meet the rescue Birds of Prey from the Evelyn Alexander Wildlife Center!⁠
🔗 Link in Bio⁠
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🍷 From Harvest to Harbor With Wölffer Estate Vineyard⁠
📅 Fri, Nov 7 | ⏰ 7–9pm⁠
📍 Le Bilboquet, Sag Harbor⁠
A five-course dinner paired with Wölffer Estate vintages hosted by Winemaker Roman Roth.⁠
🔗 Link in Bio⁠
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🎨 Artisans’ Market: A Celebration of Craft and Creativity⁠
📅 Sat–Sun, Nov 8–9 | ⏰ 11am–4pm⁠
📍 The Remsenburg Academy⁠
Shop handcrafted jewelry, ceramics, stained glass, and more!⁠
🔗 Link in Bio⁠
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🍽️ Long Island Restaurant Week: Fall Edition⁠
📅 Thurs–Sun, Nov 6–9 | ⏰ 12pm–12am⁠
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Dine local and discover new favorites during Fall Restaurant Week!⁠
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🎤 Bowie Station at The Stephen Talkhouse⁠
📅 Sat, Nov 8 | ⏰ 8pm⁠
📍 Amagansett⁠
Step back in time with the ultimate Bowie tribute band!⁠
🔗 Link in Bio⁠
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🎭 The Met: Live In HD – La Bohéme⁠
📅 Sat, Nov 8 | ⏰ 1–5pm⁠
📍 Guild Hall, East Hampton⁠
Opera in the Hamptons—see the world’s most beloved opera on screen!⁠
🔗 Link in Bio⁠
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📚 Author Talk with Lance Richardson⁠
📅 Sat, Nov 8 | ⏰ 3–4:30pm⁠
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Hear about the making of Peter Matthiessen’s biography.⁠
🔗 Link in Bio⁠
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🎷 Poetry and Jazz in Bridgehampton⁠
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An evening of poetry, music, and art with Alexis Pauline Gumbs.⁠
🔗 Link in Bio⁠
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🥾 Montauk Point State Park Hike⁠
📅 Sat, Nov 8 | ⏰ 10am–12pm⁠
📍 Montauk Point State Park⁠
Take a relaxed, scenic hike through Montauk’s beautiful trails.⁠
🔗 Link in Bio⁠
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🤠 Line Dancing in East Hampton⁠
📅 Sat, Nov 8 | ⏰ 6–9pm⁠
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Grab your boots and get ready to line dance!⁠
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#hamptons #weekend #hike #wolffer #restaurantweek #poetry #jazz #books #linedancing
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⁠
The Scrollathon is a large-scale, inclusive, and ongoing project by the Ladd brothers, inspired by the ancient scroll as a form of communication. Using found and upcycled materials, participants engage with others as they create art objects that connect them both to their own experiences and to the wider world. Each participant makes one scroll to keep and one or more to contribute to the collective sculpture.⁠
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@longhousereserve @stevenandwilliam⁠

📸: @jessicadalenephotography 
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Check out the full gallery at Hamptons.com (Link in Bio)⁠
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#nationalscrollathon #longhousereserve #hamptons
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Participants were invited to drive, push, pull, or tow their car, boat, truck, or motorcycle to the event and enjoy a fun day admiring the impressive lineup of vehicles. The afternoon concluded with a car cruise to Montauk, a scenic parade of classic cars. Proceeds benefited The Tyler Project, an organization dedicated to raising awareness about mental health and cyberbullying through counseling, educational services, and community programs. @tylerprojectorg⁠
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Check out the full gallery at Hamptons.com ⁠
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📸: Photography by Richard Lewin⁠
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#carshow #community #amagansett #tylerproject
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Real-savvy Hamptons people know that Amagansett North is a quiet kind of magic—close enough to feel the Village’s heartbeat, far enough to hear the birds. If you think 137 Cross Highway to Devon is out of the way, then you don’t know Amagansett.⁠
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Four minutes to Amber Waves, under five to Balsam Farms and the Village, and less than ten to the ocean at Atlantic Avenue Beach.⁠
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Location, of course, is the headline anyway. The essentials—farm stands, ocean and bay beaches, golf and racquet clubs, coffee, restaurants, provisions—are so close they become afterthoughts: grab greens at Balsam, seafood at Stuarts, swing back for a baguette at Amber Waves, be home before the ice melts. It’s the rare setup where everyday errands feel like part of the vacation.⁠
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