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Hamptons.com
December 12, 2019

Helping Adult Kids Without Harming Your Own Financial Future

Rocco A. Carrieroby Rocco A. Carriero
in Real Estate
Home Real Estate

Would you be willing to delay your retirement to help your child pay for their first car, college education or wedding? Increasingly a lot of Americans say the answer is yes. According to a recent study publish by Ameriprise Financial, 1 in 3 parents say they have delayed or are willing to delay their retirement to help pay for their children’s college education.* And the financial support often continues in adulthood – parents also help their adult children pay for major milestones such as their first home and weddings, sometimes at their own detriment.

As a financial advisor, I help families grapple with this kind of financial quandary. Here’s the advice I offer parents who want to give their adult children a financial head start without harming their own financial future:

Prioritize saving for your own retirement. It takes many years to accumulate the savings you need to retire comfortably. Your children are likely just starting their careers, while your time remaining in the workforce may be limited to 5, 10 or 15 years. Putting yourself first isn’t a selfish move. It’s about being wise with your money. If you make it a priority to have enough saved when you retire, your kids won’t have to worry about providing you with financial support later in life.

Be strategic with your financial gifts. Like other monetary goals, it’s important to add gifts of cash to your overall financial plan. When you treat cash gifts separately, you shortchange other priorities such as retirement. What will it cost you to divert savings from your retirement plan? With a complete list of financial priorities, you can see how much you need to save to reach them all.

Consider alternate approaches to helping your kids.There may be ways to help your kids other than by dipping into savings. Encourage them to take financial responsibility when they can do so. Your college-bound son or daughter may be able to take out student loans at a low interest rate, which will reduce or eliminate the amount you need to contribute for tuition. Instead of writing a check to help your child buy a car or house, you might co-sign on a loan to help them lock in a lower-interest rate or more favorable repayment terms.

Have conversations about money. Your willingness to talk about your finances is a valuable example for your adult children. So too is your attention to your retirement savings. I encourage parents to invite their adult children to attend a financial planning session with a financial advisor. It’s a time to address money concerns and explore how actions today can affect your future finances.

* The Modern Money study was created by Ameriprise Financial, Inc. and conducted online by Artemis Strategy Group December 11-25, 2018 among 3,008 U.S. adults between the ages of 30-69 with at least $100,000 in investable assets. For further information and details about the study, including verification of data that may not be published as part of this report, please contact Ameriprise Financial or go to Ameriprise.com .

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LOCAL EVENTS

Events

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Movement Workshop for Teens with Oliver Tobin

March 8 @ 10:30 AM - March 8 @ 12:00 PM
The Church, 48 Madison St., Sag Harbor, NY, 11963
08
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Project MOST Presents Empty Bowls

March 8 @ 12:00 PM - March 8 @ 03:00 PM
15 Montauk Hwy, East Hampton, NY, 11937
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Rescue Transport Volunteer Training Class with Evelyn Alexander Wildlife Center

March 8 @ 01:30 PM - March 8 @ 02:30 PM
228 W. Montauk Highway
08
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Mar
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Gelitin: “All For All”

March 8 @ 02:00 PM - March 8 @ 03:30 PM
The Watermill Center [39 Watermill Towd Road, Water Mill, NY 11976]
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Sing-Along the American Songbook” Jazz Jam Session by East End Jazz

March 8 @ 02:00 PM - March 8 @ 05:00 PM
Southampton Cultural Center, 25 Pond Lane, Southampton, NY
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The Holiday Spirit To Spread Throughout Downtown Riverhead

The Holiday Spirit To Spread Throughout Downtown Riverhead

  • Check out the Top Hamptons events This Weekend!⁠
⁠
🎨 2026 Student Exhibition Preview Day⁠
📅 Saturday, March 7 | ⏰ 11am–5pm⁠
📍 Parrish Art Museum, Water Mill⁠
Saturday is for the arts! Enjoy exhibition previews, a drop-in drumming circle, imagination play workshops, and a performance by the Southampton String Ensemble.⁠
⁠
🎻 Fiddler’s Green: A Traditional Irish Music Concert⁠
📅 Saturday, March 7 | ⏰ 1–2:30pm⁠
📍 Southampton History Museum, Southampton⁠
Fiddler’s Green brings the traditional music of Ireland to the East End.⁠
⁠
🍀 Pot O’ Gold Catapult Workshop⁠
📅 Saturday, March 7 | ⏰ 3–6pm⁠
📍 Children’s Museum of the East End, Bridgehampton⁠
Kids can build a catapult and launch gold coins into the lucky pot.⁠
⁠
🎸 Gene Casey and the Lone Sharks⁠
📅 Saturday, March 7 | ⏰ 8–10pm⁠
📍 Bay Street Theater, Sag Harbor⁠
Dubbed “the house band of the Hamptons,” the group brings their iconic country sound to the stage.⁠
⁠
🥣 Project MOST’s Empty Bowls⁠
📅 Sunday, March 8 | ⏰ 12–3pm⁠
📍 Amagansett American Legion Post 419⁠
Taste soups crafted by local chefs while supporting vital programs for children and families. Plus live music, a 50/50 raffle, and family fun.⁠
⁠
🎤 “Sing-Along the American Songbook” Jazz Jam⁠
📅 Sunday, March 8 | ⏰ 2–5pm⁠
📍 Southampton Cultural Center⁠
Celebrating Women’s History Month with vocalists Ludmilla Benevides and Vanessa Trouble, joined by Jane Hastay, Iris Ornig, and Carl Sarafina.⁠
⁠
🥘 Spanish Tapas & Paella Cooking Class⁠
📅 Sunday, March 8 | ⏰ 3:30–6:30pm⁠
📍 R.AIRE, Hampton Bays⁠
Cook alongside Chef Alex, enjoy wine pairings, and dine together afterward.⁠
⁠
🥾 Montauk Loop Hike⁠
📅 Saturday, March 7 | ⏰ 10am–12:30pm⁠
📍 Montauk Lighthouse⁠
Explore scenic trails and keep an eye out for harbor seals.⁠
⁠
🎬 Hoppers in IMAX⁠
📍 Southampton Playhouse⁠
Follow Mabel as her consciousness transfers into a robotic beaver and she enters the animal world.⁠
⁠
📚 BookHampton Book Club: Vigil⁠
📅 Tuesday, March 10 | ⏰ 4pm⁠
📍 LongHouse Reserve, East Hampton⁠
Join fellow readers to discuss George Saunders’ newest book.⁠
⁠
Visit Hamptons.com for more events!⁠
⁠
#weekend #hamptons #hoppers #events #books
  • Quogue Wildlife Refuge held its beloved “Light The Night” trail walk. I’ve heard through the grapevine that the annual walk is magical, peaceful, and paints the dreaded cold winter nights in a whole new light (literally).⁠
⁠
The community braced the cold, freezing temperatures as they followed a lantern trail and entered a quaint marketplace with a Hamptons Coffee Company booth serving delicious, complimentary hot chocolate in reusable mugs, a merch booth with an impressive selection of animal stickers, beanies, pins, maps, stuffed animals, and my personal favorite, a bandana with a map of the Refuge. A must-have for any wildlife fanatic.⁠
⁠
📸: Quogue Wildlife Refuge & Dennis Maroulas & Hamptons.com⁠
⁠
Read the full article at Hamptons.com (Link in Bio)⁠
⁠
#quoguewildliferefuge #lightthenight #trail #community
  • As the Hamptons’ ultra-luxury sector accelerates—with sales above $20 million doubling year-over-year—an architecturally significant coastal contemporary estate has entered the market at $32 million.⁠
⁠
Located at 200 Rose Hill Road in Water Mill, the newly constructed residence spans approximately 19,000 square feet across three levels and is set on 2.29 landscaped acres overlooking a 65-acre agricultural reserve. Mecox Bay lies at the end of the street, with Atlantic Ocean beaches just moments beyond.⁠
⁠
Recently acquired by Moskow Management Trust and offered fully furnished, the gated estate is exclusively represented by Vince Horcasitas of Saunders & Associates.⁠
⁠
@vinceinthehamptons⁠
@hamptonsrealestate⁠
⁠
Read the full article at Hamptons.com (Link in Bio)⁠
.⁠
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#hamptons #realestate #luxury #watermill
  • Check out the Top Hamptons Events This Weekend!⁠
⁠
From art openings to live music and family fun — here’s what’s happening:⁠
⁠
🖼 Opening Reception: Reclaiming Death Exhibition⁠
📍 Ma’s House, Southampton⁠
🕔 Saturday, Feb 28 | 5–8PM⁠
A powerful group exhibition featuring 20 artists exploring personal and cultural end-of-life practices.⁠
⁠
🎬 2026 Oscar-Nominated Short Films at Sag Harbor Cinema⁠
🕗 Saturday, Feb 28 | 8–10PM⁠
Catch this year’s Oscar-nominated Animated, Documentary, and Live Action shorts.⁠
⁠
👨‍👩‍👧 Family Day at Guild Hall⁠
🕐 Saturday, Feb 28 | 1–3PM⁠
Stop-motion films, tours, and hands-on activities for all ages.⁠
⁠
🥾 Four Ponds Hike⁠
📍 Long Pond Greenbelt Nature Center, Bridgehampton⁠
🕙 Saturday, Feb 28 | 10AM–12PM⁠
A scenic 3.5-mile hike with pond views.⁠
⁠
🎸 The Surfcasters: A Led Zeppelin Celebration at Bay Street Theater⁠
🕗 Saturday, Feb 28 | 8–10PM⁠
Classic rock energy all night long.⁠
⁠
🎻 Clarice Jensen Live at The Church⁠
🗓 Sunday, March 1 | 3–4:30PM⁠
A contemporary classical performance from her latest album.⁠
⁠
🎨 Clay Workshop for Kids⁠
📍 Mudita, Water Mill⁠
🕚 Saturday, Feb 21 | 11AM–12PM⁠
Hands-on creative fun with clay.⁠
⁠
🎤 The Seismatics at Stephen Talkhouse⁠
🗓 Feb 27 | 8PM⁠
Modern + classic rock hits.⁠
⁠
🍷 Wine Wednesday at Nick & Toni’s⁠
🗓 March 4 | 5:30–7PM⁠
Discover highlights from Frederick Wildman.⁠
⁠
Check out more events at Hamptons.com (Link in Bio)⁠
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#hamptons #arts #oscars #easthamptons #weekend
  • Charlie Fox Dispensary wants you to know what you put in your body.⁠
⁠
So, if you’re looking for a clear, uncluttered, and elevated cannabis experience, Charlie Fox is for you. If you’re a first-timer, excited to explore cannabis (now legal in New York), or a lifelong enjoyer who’s looking for the best cannabis on the East End, find it at Charlie Fox Dispensary.⁠
⁠
New to Southampton in 2026, Charlie Fox Dispensary is elevating the Hamptons’ luxury wellness/cannabis space with edibles (and drinkables) for every occasion, CBD+, premium vapes and pre-rolls, wellness topicals and remedies, the best flower in the Hamptons, and accessories you won’t have to hide when you entertain.⁠
⁠
Founded by the luxury-minded, hospitality-focused team behind Calissa, you already know it’s chic, with an obvious focus on boutique-level service and one-on-one facetime for anyone (over 21, obvi) who comes through the doors, open 7 days a week, 471 County Road 39 in Southampton.⁠
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Read the full article at the Hamptons.com (Link in Bio)⁠
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#charliefox #southampton
  • Husband and wife duo John and Kelly Piccinnini are thrilled to announce they will be taking over operations of the iconic Sag Harbor property at 1 Main Street, The Corner Bar, maintaining the restaurant’s original name.⁠
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The local couple, who also own The Clam Bar and Sett Coffee, both located in Amagansett, are excited to introduce a refreshed concept that honors The Corner Bar’s storied past while ushering in a new era. The vision preserves The Corner Bar’s beloved, old-school neighborhood charm while updating the design, brand, and menu for a more modern sensibility. Guests can expect a thoughtfully designed space with an approachable vibe – timeless, local, and familiar.⁠
⁠
Read the full article at Hamptons.com (Link in Bio)⁠
⁠
#cornerbar #sagharbor #hamptons #bar
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